The Five (Jewish) Love Languages
In 1992, Marriage Counselor Gary Chapman published The Five Love Languages, which outlines the five different ways in which love can be expressed and received. The...
Hey, Uh, So We Let the Intern Write a Music Review and He Went a Little Crazy with the Metaphors
Inspired loosely by this (absolutely wild) review of Dent May’s album in Paste Where to begin with Chopper Price’s new Album? It’s classic, but it...
Overthink This Text, and We’ll Give You a Half-Assed Reply a Couple Hours Later!
Texting is easy, breezy, beautiful fun for us well-adjusted, super chill college students who overthink nothing, are super chill, well-adjusted and super chill.
Diary of a Dinosaur During The Extinction
I tried to convince a local group of pterosaurs of the danger but they denied it straight to my face, saying that "the ash cloud...
5 Ways To Know For Sure If Martha Stewart Has Possessed Your White Suburban Mom
Have you ever been struck with the sudden and debilitating concern that Martha Stewart, the godmother of lifestyle queens, may have hijacked your mother's soul...
Hi I’m Karen I’m a First-Year and I Really Want My Roommate to Love Me
“Goodnight,” she says to me. “Goodnight,” I respond cheerily. This is the first time she’s ever told me goodnight. She will never know how much...
ShameWalk: DPS Unveils New ‘Morning-After Solution for your Going-Home Needs’
Now, here at The Rib of Brown we have the scoop on a new and long anticipated program to be rolled out and launched this...
Parents! Check your kids’ candy wrappers!
Gone are the days of simple razor blades. Stay vigilant grownups.
Club Penguin-gate
I figured I would start small with words that my four year old brother says and would level up from there. And so, my montage...
What If I Haven’t Been A Bad, Bad Boy? An Innocent’s Guide to Rice Purity
Because of my fear of other peoples’ bodily fluids, I had remained unexposed to the world of genitals, a realm of sex, drugs, and rock...