Brown Football Cures Breast Cancer by Bench Pressing on Main Green With Their Friends
It is with great bewilderment and excitement for the future of medicine that I would like to announce that the Brown University Football Team has...
Faunce Arch Preacher Just Doing Rejection Therapy
As I started to walk back to my dorm after a grueling 9 a.m. class in Sayles hall, I heard one of my least favorite...
Very Hungry Caterpillar Goes on Ozempic
“I know my whole brand was about eating,” the arthropod explained in his video, “but I’m the skinniest and hottest I’ve ever been. Get fucked...
Woke Flasher Asks for Consent
I walked down Thayer street today for the first time in a while and I regret to inform you guys that there’s now a flasher...
Home Depot Launches Feminist Sister Store “Hoe Depot” to Make Hardware Stores Less Scary for Women
Power tools are out, empowerment is in...
Oops! Snow Plowing Budget Spent on Andrews Bento Boxes
On February 23rd, the city of Providence received a record 37.9 inches of snow. Students across campus rejoiced after learning they would receive a snow...
Did you enjoy Heated Rivalry? Here are 5 totally real, legit queer shows to watch next!
1. MerlinDo you like the enemies-to-lovers vibe of Heated Rivalry? Then you’ll love Merlin. Imagine if hockey were sword fighting, and only one of them...
Nepo Baby Actually Prefers Person-First “Baby Experiencing Nepotism”
In a touching Instagram story earlier this morning, 22-year-old nepo baby Charlotte Kennedy Rockefeller-Boeing fiercely pushed back against the use of the term “nepo baby”...
Friend Who Eats Jo’s Salad Would Also Eat Compost If Given The Chance
Yeah…I’ll get spinach, cantaloupe, feta, grapes, and uhh…yeah you can put an egg on it, ranch dressing is fine
Bummer! Lesbian Couple You Were Rooting For From Behind Actually Just Guy With Beautiful Long Hair and His Girlfriend
In a devastating blow to queer joy, the lesbian couple you were walking behind on Wickenden Street turned out to be a straight couple with...