Spring Break Acceptance Speech
*Applause* *Whistles* *Shouts* Wow, thank you all so much. *Sheds a tear* You can stop clapping now. Actually don’t. *Winks* *Audience laughs* *Camera zooms towards...
QUIZ: Pen, Sneaker, or Condom?
Most people nowadays use their phones as crutches to avoid uncomfortable social situations. I could have done this too, as I tried to fill the...
I Will Not Rest Until I Beat Bobby Flay
Every Thursday from 2 to 7 p.m., Bobby Flay torments me. It doesn’t matter if it’s coq au vin, chicken and waffles, or seafood paella;...
6 Reasons Why Blueno is The New Ra
It’s time we pointed out the obvious! Here are six very solid and well-researched reasons as to why everyone’s favorite bear sculpture is the new...
It’s Not You, Brown. It’s Me.
cw: body image I wish I could navigate the JWW stairwell with the stealth and speed of a snow leopard, instead of feeling like a...
To-Do List Of A Procrastinator
Due: two weeks ago __clean yo room overdue __watch lecture captures from those two lectures you missed because you were cramming for a physics exam ...
Kabob & Curry Naan Addiction Named a Public Health Crisis
Thursday, March 15, 4:00 PM Blue Room, Brown University The Center for Disease Control has officially named Kabob & Curry naan addiction a public health...
Fifty Shades of Green
Prologue I never thought we would end up here. Not because I didn’t want to (because believe me, I wanted to) but because, I never...
The Upside of Having Four Eyes
When I was little, I had better than perfect vision (15/20). Yeah, you read that right suckerssss! But, as my eyes began to scrunch more...
I Can’t Believe I Want to Bone Andy Samberg
I remember running through dark halls, trying to get away from it all. Bats shrieked and witches cackled. Terrifying children called to each other with...