Yes, you ARE pregnant
Are you three days late for your period? Has the dining hall food been making you sick? Been getting no sleep? Never had a period...
Girl From “Just Outside of Boston,” Born and Raised in Rural Maine
You meet her at the freshman orientation ice cream social and ask where she’s from. Without missing a beat, she replies, “Just Outside of Boston.”...
Stoned Tour Guide Claims 14 Stories of SciLi Represent 14 Letters of the Alphabet
On an April 20th afternoon tour that definitely should have been postponed or cancelled, senior Brown tour guide, Mary Jane, proudly proclaimed that the 14...
Straight Woman Homophobia Getting Boring? Other Phobias You Can Adopt to Keep Things Fresh
Homophobia is everywhere these days, and so are twinks, if straight women are to be believed. If you want to be at the cutting edge...
Man Has Big Feelings, Must Be Love
In recognition of Valentine’s day, I am here to remind us all of one of the shortcomings of straight male emotional processing: past a certain...
Build-A-Strap Workshop and Other Places to Take Your Bisexual Boyfriend this Valentine’s Day
I am legally obligated to disclose that this is an ad for Big Pegging.
Heartbreaking: Man in Dry Spell Really Looking Forward To Naked Donut Run Misses It
He got on Sidechat to complain right away too, fucking freak.
The Newest Water Bottle Fad Is Here and It’s an Ancient Wineskin Made From Weathered Goat Hide
Move over, Owala. So long, Stanley Cup. Ta ta, Hydroflask. There’s a new hydration vessel in town, and it’s pungent, aesthetic, and adds protein as...
Morgan and Her Friend Linus Seeking 2 Other Current Juniors to Join Their Housing Group for Next Year (This is Not a Joke)
Just to be upfront, they want a suite but lowkey don't want to live in Danoff or Chen because Morgan doesn't get cell service there....
Caveman has World’s First Awkward Conversation, Invents Gun
The evolution of humankind has many hallmarks, from our humble beginnings as monkeys to our scientific discoveries as rational thinkers. Yet we must not overlook...