Bad Luck Babe! On Turning 13 on Friday the 13th
Shoutout to Taylor Swift for making 13 cool again, and fuck you Taylor Swift for making everyone think I am copying you!
Public Health Officials Trace Massive Campus Chlamydia Outbreak to Number of Undergrads Unable to Resist Romance of Fucking Under the Northern Lights
Not since Timothée Chalamet’s prowling of the hallowed halls of NYU dorms has there been such a high number of cases on a college campus.
Brown Outing Club Celebrates National Coming Out Day by Releasing List of Closeted Students
In an unconventional celebration of National Coming Out Day, the Brown Outing Club has released a list of closeted LGBTQ+ students. While this endeavor has...
Brown Corporation Commits to Maintaining University Neutrality by Jamming Fingers in Ears and Going “LALALALA”
What was that about funding genocide? WE CAN’T HEAR YOU!
10 Ways to Heal Your Inner Child
Are you feeling lost and alone? Do not fear. I have a simple 10 step process that will cure all your woes. You must heal...
Swiftie Who Put Money on a Brown Win Because of 13 Omens Now Richest Person Alive
They know how to ball, she most certainly does not know Aristotle, but she does know how to make a quick buck.
Is That Girl In My Seminar Middle-Class Or Did She Buy Those 2008 Air Jordans For $300 On Depop?
Some questions for the nosy and misguided, in case you, too, want to feel like a reporter for a shittier version of Us Weekly.
DIY Tips to Charm Your Room Inspector Into Ignoring Your Giant Pile of Fire
Hide your toasters, hide your tapestries, it’s health & safety check season!
REI Launches New Encampment Line
Here at REI, we’ve been overjoyed to see so many young people expressing their love for errr…camping, which is why we’re thrilled to announce our...