If you happened to grace the corner of Waterman and Brown Street yesterday, you would have found yourself amidst the relaxing sounds of traditional Scottish bagpipes, drums, and suit-wearing incels shouting about the rights of the unborn.
The afternoon’s entertainment was rumored to be the brain-child of President Paxson herself.
When asked for comment, President Paxson admitted to having invited the red-pinny-clad crew to campus, saying that she thought they would serve as a powerful reminder “of all the fucked up shit happening right here in New England. Why march about some deeply complex and nuanced foreign conflict,” the President added, “when we have so much to be scared of right here in our tiny state!”
Despite witness reports of a dap-up-twenty-dollar exchange between the President and the men, Cristina Paxson made it clear that she does not support their efforts, “I hate those guys,” she claimed, “I can guarantee that none of our endowment goes to their cause!”
When asked to comment on some of the other industries to which the University’s endowment contributes, President Paxson quietly slipped away in her signature, super inconspicuous red coat.