Single on Valentine’s Day
It’s that time of year again. Everywhere you look you’ll find triumphant winners or sore losers. If you are on the former side, you’ll find...
Valentine’s and Data Mines
Do you feel like your significant other doesn’t fully understand you? Do you want to be with someone who knows you automatically, and doesn’t ask...
The Four Times a Boy Called Me Cute and the Four Times I Did Absolutely Nothing About It
It’s time to start stockpiling the Sweethearts, the roses, and the memories of your past romances. Well…not so much for the last one. If you’re...
Confessions of a Lipstick Addict
My obsession with lipstick began in kindergarten on the day when I received my own first-ever lip product: the universally-recognized and highly-pursued Lip Smackers. “My lips can...
On Turning Nineteen
My nineteenth birthday was about a month ago. I was incredibly lucky to have spent it at home with friends and family, but I couldn’t...
Fixing Feng Shui, re: Andrews Commons
Every time I visit the hallowed halls of Andrews Commons, I question all the stylistic choices that went into its interior decorating. It’s an assault...
A Wedding Whirlwind in the Upspace
It started out like any other Sunday morning. I was dehydrated, still wearing last night’s smeared mascara, and suffering from an insatiable craving for Bagel...
Catify Your Galentines
by Emily Adams It’s the Monday after Fourth of July, or as CVS knows it, a day too late to begin the Valentine’s blitzkrieg. In...
Shopping Period: A Choose-Your-Own-Adventure Story
Welcome to Shopping Period. You wake up in the middle of an unfamiliar lecture hall. The professor, an older man wearing a sweater with elbow...
Dr. Ben Carson Explains
My Dearest American People, It has come to my attention that many members of the mainstream media are calling my delayed entrance to the Republican...