The Case of the Killer Chairs
Head Detective Tristan Oakes swatted away the yellow crime scene tape as he entered the Keeney dorm room. It was a horrible sight, unlike anything...
Annie Warner and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Doctor’s Appointment
Alice Morse Earle once said “every day might not be good, but there is something good in every day.” This is both a wonderful sentiment...
Getting Accepted into the Ivy League (Campus Story)
The Ivy League Campus Story. I know you’ve heard of it. I know you’re obsessed with it. Don’t try to hide it from me. I...
“Going Off of That”: I HATE Section
I hate section. I always have. I always will. As a freshman, I used to think, “I Love College!” That is, until I learned that sections...
What it Feels Like to Receive Friend Requests from Upperclassmen
Despite priding myself on having a pretty good handle on life as a first-year in Brunonia (I’ve never been late to any of my small...
Musings of the Bear Statue Next to Faunce
September 3rd 2015 Dear Diary: I have been startled awake from my summer hibernation. Today, a scrawny human and its owners posed on and near me...
Chronicles of the Post-Halloween Pumpkin
I know what you’re thinking — another Halloween article?! But if the following isn’t proof that Halloween spookiness continues long after the 31st, I don’t know what...
The Woes of Being a Spoiled Only Child
No one wants to listen to an only child talk about his or her problems. It’s a fact. Everyone has this idea that only children have the...
A Comprehensive Analysis of Carrel Writings at the Rock
Whenever I’m studying at a carrel in the Rock, I make sure to read everything people have written on it. I choose a different carrel every time,...
Rib Roundup: Halloween Costume Edition
by Ali Macleod Note: A previous version of this article neglected to include Annie Warner’s fucking kickass costumes. She gets to go first now, because...