What To Do If You’re Not Sure If You Saw a Football Team Fight Club Happening on the BioMed Terrace or If You Just Had a Weird Dream Posted on December 10, 2024December 10, 2024 by Emerson Rhodes I am Jack’s Enflamed Sense of Fear
How to Politely Avoid Eye Contact With Your Friend Whose Eyes Are So Blue and Scary They Look AI-Generated Posted on November 20, 2024January 13, 2026 by Sophia Plaschke In a world of many terrors, few things are as unsettling as a person whose eyes are so blue and striking they seem to come...
10 Costumes So Politically Correct, Even Your Wokest Friends Will Be Impressed Posted on October 30, 2024October 29, 2024 by Sophia Plaschke Every year, white people never cease to amaze me with the offensiveness of their Halloween costumes. Like seriously, who raised you? Just remember: no dressing...
My Advice For Neurotypicals Struck By the Adderall Shortage Posted on October 25, 2024 by Anya Kaladeen please, sir, may I have some more?
10 Ways to Heal Your Inner Child Posted on October 7, 2024 by Cassie Travis Are you feeling lost and alone? Do not fear. I have a simple 10 step process that will cure all your woes. You must heal...
20 Things Easier to Navigate Than the Brown Housing Lottery Posted on April 9, 2024July 19, 2025 by Ribs by Lorde It's one of Brown’s most opaque administrative wonders.
Venmo Requesting Your Male Friends for $0.16 and Other Ways to Celebrate Women’s History Month Posted on March 8, 2024 by Morgan Anderson What’s not to love about March? There are the first signs of Spring, Pisces season, and — most importantly — Women’s History Month! As a...
5 Must-Haves for University Presidents This Holiday Season Posted on December 16, 2023December 17, 2023 by twink husband A handy gift guide for these PR-atrocities personified.
Campus buzz: Hypothetically, if everyone found out you ordered a sex toy to the mailroom, WWYD? Posted on December 3, 2023 by The Rib Now every snail mail fan knows that you like to *ahem* “polish the pearl” and just how you like to do it.
Dear Free Inquiry at Brown, Please Bring My Problematic Faves to Campus Posted on November 29, 2023December 27, 2025 by Sophia Plaschke I do not condone any of the harmful statements and actions by those mentioned in this article.