Dear Seniors, Please Don’t Leave
As this semester wraps up, many of us on campus are getting ready to say goodbye to the Class of 2017, which sounds like fake...
The Dangers of Online Bikini Shopping
I hate online shopping. I don’t understand how people do it. The clothes never look as good as they did online, or they don’t fit,...
Always A Text Away!
Staying in contact with family and friends is an objectively good thing. It’s nice to know a bit about what shenanigans your family is engaging...
The Very Real Fear of Being Invited To Very Fake Parties
I have a lot of fears. Most are rational – failure, nuclear war, going to the doctor – but there’s one fear I have that I’ve...
Presenting: The Mailroom
Brown can be a self-selective place. If you’re a freshman, you’re probably hanging out in Keeney or on Pembroke. If you’re involved in Greek Life...
My Story: I Got a Record Deal from Humming in the Ratty
My trip to the Ratty started like any other. I got up from my table and started humming a tune the second my foot hit...
On Making the First Move
I am a young, empowered, millennial woman, who no longer has the time to wait around. It’s 2017, so why shouldn’t I make the first...
Keeney Gym: An Exposé
Last year, I came to the conclusion that Keeney Gym is a nexus for strange happenings after witnessing two bizarre events there. These stories could...
People Who Throw Spaghetti Against the Wall to See if it’s Done
There are three big things that I remember seeing in the movies before I saw them in real life: sex, communion, and throwing spaghetti against...
CVS: Friend or Foe?
I don’t exaggerate when I say that CVS is a haven. I float from aisle to aisle, rocking my headphones as I contemplate my latest...