Last Wednesday I entered Rockstar Body Piercing on Thayer Street for the first time in my life, and it was a milestone to be sure. On this day in history, not only did they poke a hole in my nose – they also poked a hole in my fantasy of what a piercing parlor looks like.
I got my ears pierced at the tender age of sixteen in Claire’s (which, by the way, is the only acceptable reason to be in Claire’s when your tween years are behind you). It was a simple experience that apparently left me hungry for more, because I felt compelled to pay another person to put another hole in my body! Nothing better than throwing your hard-earned dollar at a stranger in exchange for a light stabbing, am I right, ladies?!
My point is, I didn’t know much about real piercing parlors, but now that I am a seasoned and experienced veteran, I feel qualified to present you with a guide to Rockstar Body Piercing.
Here’s what really caught me off guard: It is an extremely well-lit establishment. In my dreams, Rockstar Body Piercing was a grungy and hardcore store, lit by some well-placed blacklights at the most, or a singular unshaded lightbulb at the least. I wasn’t sure how the piercers would be able to see their work, but I still felt strangely confident that they could perform their jobs based on touch alone. My point: If you’re looking for that edgy vibe guaranteed to terrify and disappoint your mother, you will not find it here.
I’d like to offer some advice to the prospective “piercees” out there: Do not go to Rockstar while under the influence of alcohol or any drug. You might think this need not be said, but I would be remiss not to include every detail of my experience. Prior to the piercing, I may or may not have indulged in a glass of wine. It seemed harmless, and I felt confident that it would help me calm any nerves about the pain. What it actually did was make me paranoid that I had compromised my judgment terribly and that I was way more intoxicated than in reality. When the piercer marked a dot on my nose and asked if the placement was okay, I said yes, and then a wave of doubt consumed me. I do not recommend the crippling fear that comes when you’re unsure if you just gave a man the go-ahead to stab you in an acceptable location. Stay sober, kids.
You should also be prepared for the people you will meet on your journey. I had the painful pleasure of being pierced by a man whose name I don’t remember but face I will never forget. Steer clear of chatting this dude up. I pushed the small talk hard, and even asked, “What’s your favorite piercing to do?” to which he replied, “I like the people,” leaving me confused, unsatisfied, and desperate for his approval. My friend who accompanied me later told me she was concerned because the piercer kept closing his eyes for extended amounts of time right before the piercing. Whoops, I didn’t even notice. Thanks, wine!
Finally, it’s important to note that Rockstar Body Piercing is on the second floor of its building – probably to weed out those who aren’t determined enough to climb a flight of stairs – so be prepared for that test. With this guide to, well, guide you, I promise your piercing experience will be a true Hero’s Journey to rival The Epic of Gilgamesh or Shrek.
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