Better Senior Superlative Categories
by Dana Schwartz After four years at Brown University, the college with the philosophy that demands students cast off one-track academic focus in favor of a...
The Declassified Guide to Inner Peace
A few short weeks ago, I gracefully slammed my head into a cabinet and incurred a mild concussion. The consequences of this action included a...
Thanksgiving, As Told Through “How I Met Your Mother” Gifs
Ah, going home for Thanksgiving – the holy week of laundry machines that don’t need quarters, a fridge full of food you haven’t bought with...
The .5er Haiku Series
In honor of the .5er graduation in two weeks, I present…The .5er Haiku Series! Haiku I: The self-loathing .5er Where did it all go? Bye...
The Seven Wonders of the College World
1.) The Eternal Load of Laundry: A striking mix of dingy whites and colors that occupies an annoyingly large space in the corner of every dorm...
A Guide to Backpacks in College
As a child, shopping for school supplies was always one of my guilty nerd pleasures. An array of folders begging to be decorated with stickers,...
The Illusion of Workout Clothes
After eight years of wearing a uniform to school, I now struggle with the concept of “picking out an outfit” for class. Back then, it...
A Bad Case of Ivyitis
The doctor strode into the room, a clipboard in his hand and a grim look on his face. “Tell it to me straight, Doctor. What–what...
An Open Letter to Mom, Dad, and Starbucks
I was well and truly delighted when I got the email that said I had been accepted to The Rib. Writing, comedy, and women are...
The Never-Mentioned Pros of Long Distance
It’s an all-too-common scene. Innocent girl discloses her relationship status to a friend – “Yeah, we’re doing the long distance thing” – and immediately gets...