Stupid School Life Hacks
While most TV shows and Target ads depict mid- to late-October as a time for students to enjoy the beautiful autumn weather and J. Crew...
I Ate As Many Apples As I Could In Five Days And You Won’t Believe What Happened
Recently I’ve noticed a trend in online investigative journalism (here I use the term “investigative journalism” very loosely) – that can be best described as...
Sneak Preview Of My Upcoming Celebrity Memoir
I don’t know about you, but my summer was amazing. It was so good I managed to convince myself for the first time ever that...
Annoying Walkers
Lately around campus, people have been annoying me more than usual. Too often I find myself walking somewhere and minding my own business, when suddenly...
Overcoming Tinder Phobias
For many years I possessed an acute phobia of Tinder. It freaked me out to think about strange boiz in strange places looking at pictures...
Conspiracies On The Hill
You know, I really love a good conspiracy theory. Aliens in Area 51? Um, yes bitch, the truth is out there! Did Bush do 9/11 (and...
Please Help Me, Lin-Manuel Miranda
Dear Mr. Miranda, Hey, Lin! First off, I just want to say that I love Hamilton. I anticipated its release last September, and it quickly...
A Day In the Life On the Hill, In Haiku
I sit by Blueno with my blueberry bagel, bought from the Blue Room. +++ Back row of lecture, I see a couple kissing. Too early for...
Will You Go Bald?
It’s the million dollar or $39.99 box of rogaine question that’s on everyone’s mind. Will you go bald? The answer to that question lies in...
Pitbull and Moms: A Theory
I’ve only been in college for about a month now, and yet frenzied and overzealous pals are already talking about dreams of graduate schools and...