My Boyfriend Does Not Believe I Play The Trombone
In November, I told my boyfriend that I played trombone in the 4th & 5th grade. He did not believe me. He said “you are...
The Name’s Statty…Statty Daddy.
Fellas, just when you thought that your ladies were safe because Jacob Sartorius is off the market, there’s a new babe magnet in town (*Camera...
Penmanship
What’s up? I’m Suzanne, I’m 20, and I never fucking learned how to write (said in the cadence of this vine)! I somehow managed to...
I’ve Been Having the Most Mundane Dreams
They’re so boring that I mistake them for real life.
It’s The 5 Year High School Reunion and It’s Time To Find Out Who Vapes
Welcome to the 5 year high school reunion! We’re packing it all in: jello-shots in the locker room, unsupervised grinding to the greatest hits of...
Old MacDonald Had a Dorm
In imagining my perfect junior year life, my mental wanderings have all included two key features: (1.) living off-campus (2.) with some sort of creature-companion....
Hot Takes on Love and Juice from My Fever Dream
Listen up, world. It’s Dana here, your girl. Long time, no see—and by “long time” I mean approximately the last 24 hours and by “no...
5 Ways To Convey You’re Queer That Definitely Aren’t Just “Wear Lots of Flannels”
Recently, VICE published a piece called “Let’s End Flannel as a Lesbian Signifier Once and for All,” in which Erin Sullivan, the author and presumable...