Why We Can’t “Let It Go”
Thank god for my mom. Maybe it’s because she spent copious hours in labor to birth me, or because of the fact we spend all...
How Your Ex Never Leaves You
I’ve always believed that I would know I was over someone when he stopped crossing my mind every day. I have found, through diligent research, that this is...
Chipotle: A Regional Ethnography
When it comes to meals, I’m the kind of person that will always seek out a food truck or acclaimed local joint before I succumb...
An Open Letter to Mom, Dad, and Starbucks
I was well and truly delighted when I got the email that said I had been accepted to The Rib. Writing, comedy, and women are...
To Subtweet or Not to Subtweet?
As a self-proclaimed “O.G. Twitter Rascal,” I endorse all kinds of Twitter shenanigans. A haiku about sushi? Tweet it. A picture not quite up to...
Hangover Guilt
I open my eyes. I have no recollection of where I am. A hotel room? The morning sun shines through the window, casting an orange...
This Is What Happens When You Decide to Wax Your Armpits
There have been many moments in which it begins to haunt you. You Nair them an hour and a half before your Bat Mitzvah...
The Truth About GBF’s
Shortly after meeting my eventual best friend Danny, I developed an enormous crush on him. Shortly after developing an enormous crush on him, he told...
The Girl Who Has Dated EVERY. DIET. EVER.
I am a serial dater. I wish I could say with men…okay more with boys, but unfortunately that is not the case. I date diets....
The Detachable Penis
After an endless week, I had finally made it to the weekend. I staggered to my room, collapsed into a chair, and dumped the contents...