10 World Leaders and their Pump-Up Jams

The life of a world leader is a hard one. What other job simultaneously makes you responsible for millions of bosses and responsible for millions of employees? By day you’re managing a pandemic and by night you’re being blamed for raiding and plundering the cities of northern China. Naturally, world leaders need self-care too, so when it came out that former president Donald Trump hired a “Music Man” to play him “Memory” from the (classic and critically acclaimed) musical Cats to pull him “from the brink of rage,” I was not surprised.

Fortunately, The Rib of Brown has acquired exclusive access to the music that soothes, excites, and inspires these additional 10 world leaders to share with you today.

Justin Trudeau

When the Mini-pet settles down to sleep, there’s one thing he makes sure to remind himself of: the Canadian people have a hot PM.

Vladimir Putin

Putin sees himself in Mr. Worldwide: bald, powerful, and “on fire.”

Kim Jong Un

These three girlbosses get him pumped for weapons testing!

Pope Francis

Who enjoys Garden-of-Eden-allusions more than the Pope? I guess we have Lil Nas X to thank for the Vatican’s (barely) improved tolerance of the queer community.

Emmanuel Macron

In tough times, it’s always helpful to turn to the people you love most in the world. For Macron, those are his maternal figures.

Genghis Khan

Let’s ride.

Queen Elizabeth II

Even if the British military is no longer the strongest in the world, Her Majesty can always relive the days of successful imperial conquests through the music of her namesake band.

Xi Jinping

Term limits? They don’t keep him up at night. Is it ever gonna change? (No) Am I gonna be President 4ever? (Yes)

Abdul Fattah al-Sisi

Listening to some Iggy Igs really validates al-Sisi’s love for living lavishly. Oh, these hotels and presidential palaces? You already know.

Kanye West

Even if Kanye’s not a “successfully elected” official, he’s a cultural leader in his own right. With the 2020 race well behind him, he’s ready to shake it all off: his marriage, his album deadlines, and his beef with the head Swiftie herself.

Image via. Chloe Widman

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