Rib Beef: Babies vs. Old People
(in collaboration with Nicole Martinez) A carefree, tinkling giggle. The dampened whinny of a nose being blown into a monogrammed cotton handkerchief. These are the...
Parents In the Passenger Seat
To quote my mother: “Teaching a child to drive is more stressful than childbirth.” Gee thanks, mom! Maybe she’s right, and having to teach someone...
The Whistler
Scenario A: You’re sitting in your room, deep in focus, studying for that Orgo midterm, maybe writing that Astronomy paper, and you are in The...
Do You Even Cough?
Dear Girl who was clearing her throat for the entirety of class, At first I thought it was just a tickle of the throat. After all, that...
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Social incompetence.
by Ali MacLeod Not twenty minutes ago, I was in one of the single-occupant restrooms in Andrews. Doing what, you ask? Oh, you know, just...
What’s in the Mini-Fridge?
I rarely refrigerate anything in my room. Mostly, it’s because I tend to forget about things I’ve put in there until it’s too late. I...
The Hill and Back: A Bildungsroman
I live in a world of backpacks. College Hill is a little utopia where everyone is somewhere between 18 and 22. Cigarettes are purely aesthetic,...
They See Me Rollin’, ResLife Be Hatin’
January 21, 2016. A day that will live in infamy. At precisely 4:20pm (#blazeit) on a cold winter Tuesday, thousands of members of the Brown...
Life Explained by An Amateur Sociologist: Hookup Culture
I am a sociologist. Okay, fine. I’m a sociologist-in-training. Okay, fine, I’m concentrating in Literary Arts and I’ve taken two sociology classes. Okay fine, one-and-a-half....
The BAD LIST
A few weekends ago, I discovered that I am most certainly at the center of a government conspiracy. I also bought a bag of clothes...