1. Super hot football star who falls in love with the nerdy girl who never talked to anyone and wore baggy, unflattering clothing. How did they even meet? Because in my high school, the super hot football players spent most of their time going to parties with beer and freshman girls named Brit.
2. Said nerdy girl taking off her glasses and becoming the hottest girl at prom! And then winning prom queen! Usually, if someone has the bone structure of an icelandic model, they still look pretty good with glasses. And the criteria for winning prom queen is not “who was the most antisocial throughout the entire year but looks kind of pretty for this one night.”
3. Prom being the biggest deal ever. If you think prom is a big deal, you’re either a 13-year-old, or someone who peaked way too early.
4. Nerds getting their heads flushed in the toilet. Yes, this would be terrible. No, this has never actually happened at any high school in the United States of America.
5. The cool English teacher goes by his first name and doesn’t play by the rules. Every single class ends with an off-topic but inspiring speech. Not once in my schooling experience did a young, new teacher with crazy ideas make us believe in ourselves with his unorthodox teaching methods. We mostly read Shakespeare and stuff.
6. The clique of mean cheerleaders. Who wear their uniforms every day. Who would want to wear the same thing every day?
7. Making friends in detention. You don’t make friends in detention. You sit in a room with a middle-aged woman reading a magazine about dogs, and stare in silence. You’re probably in there with friends you already have. That’s how you got in there in the first place.
8. The cool outcast has a heart of gold. In real life, that guy in a leather jacket, smoking a cigarette is actually an asshole who’s going to end up working at the 7/11 until he’s arrested for tax fraud.
9. Someone bringing two dates to the prom and having to run back and forth and pretend to be dating both of them. SHOW ME ONE PERSON WHO HAS EVER HAD TO DO THIS. IT”S UNREALISTIC. YOU’RE ONLY SPENDING LIKE 30 SECONDS WITH EACH PERSON BEFORE YOU’RE RUNNING OFF TO THE “BATHROOM.” NO ONE HAS FUN!
10. Getting sad at graduation because “you’ll never see these people again:” Usually, that’s a good thing. For the three people from high school you do want to see again, that’s why Thanksgiving break exists.
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