Life & Other Drugs, Listicles

Haha, Thanks, I Hate It

December 19, 2017

Yo. This one’s pretty simple. Basically it’s a list of things that I hate. And when I hate things, I really love saying: “haha, thanks, I hate it.” Hence the article title. Like, picture all of these things happening or being placed right in front of my eyes and then picture me laughing in a pained way and then saying, “thanks, I hate it.” Okay. That’s it.

  1. under appreciating T-Pain
  2. knee caps as a concept
  3. the fact that baby carrots are just shaved down big carrots
  4. being touched unsolicitedly
  5. people entering my friends’ and my photo even though we explicitly excluded them in the first place
  6. that a “women’s” shirt is tight and has a v-neck??? like no I just want a normal ass t-shirt pls
  7. entering a really public space full of people when I’m alone and they all turn to look at me and I suddenly don’t know what to do with my hands
  8. on the topic of hands: figuring out where to put them in photos
  9. the aesthetic of the suburbs
  10. white people
  11. specifically, white women who say “chicas”
  12. but, again, just white people in general
  13. the fact that people paid J.K. Rowling actual human money to write that shit script for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them
  14. ppl who hurt my feelings….. hahahahahahahahaha…. aNYWAY
  15. squash, but I think that might be a me thing
  16. that acne isn’t a thing that  actually  stops with age
  17. people who are only like two years older than me treating me like I’m a baby
  18. wet scrambled eggs
  19. THAT THE UNIVERSE IS INFINITELY EXPANDING AND ENDLESS AND BLACK HOLES ARE A THING HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT THOSE HOLY FUCKING SHIT OUR SUN IS GOING TO EXPLODE AND WE ALL JUST LIVE ON A CHUNK OF ROCK LITERALLY HURLING THROUGH SPACE AT MILLIONS OF MILES PER HOUR AND WHAT HAPPENS AFTER DEATH I DON’T KNOW AND THAT IS SO SCARY AND BIG AND I AM SO SMALL AND WEAK
  20. Brad from Bio

Thank you and goodnight.

Image via Sarah Clapp.

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