Weather officials have predicted snow in Providence. Again. My real issue is that, with Saturday snow, there’s really no chance of a snow day as a reward for enduring the blistering cold and wind. Nevertheless, one can hope. One can more than hope. One can put to the test one of the many foolproof methods for ensuring a snow day.
That being said, when I suggested to a friend hoping for a snow day last week that she flush some ice down her toilet she looked at me like I was losing it. Apparently not everyone’s childhood was as superstitious and methodical when it came to snow days as mine was. Well, whether you’ve been deprived of such outlets for hope, or have simply gotten rusty on your snow day rituals, here’s a comprehensive list of all one can do to increase the likelihood of ENSURE a snow day dream comes true.
Flush Ice Cube(s) Down the Toilet
I’ve heard this one has something to do with sending a message to the “snow gods,” who I must assume live among all my deceased goldfish (RIP Flippers I-IV) somewhere in the depths of our sewage system. Nonetheless, this trick is one of the oldest snow day rituals I know of and requires very little effort. I hope your ice trays are filled! If not, I suggest carrying ice in a cup from your closest eatery, as body heat tends to melt ice when handheld… Not that I’ve been trying to carry ice back from Jo’s every night to optimize snow day opportunities…
Sleep With a Spoon Under Your Pillow
Another age-old trick that reminds me of my elementary (and middle and high) school days. I’ve always been unsure of any material restrictions on this one— will plastic spoons do, or are metal spoons a necessity? (I really don’t like doing dishes. Sorry Mother Earth.) Also very unsure about the connection between spoons and snow. Is it because they both start with ‘S’s?
Wear Your PJ’s Inside Out and Backwards
According to the Grand Haven Tribune, “the inside-out and backward pajamas is meant to confuse the snow gods in some strange way and prompt them to deliver a blanket of snow.” Plus it’s just fun, looks silly, and gives me an excuse to ditch the oversized tee for a matching pajama set with peace signs that I got for my birthday this year.
Run Around The Table Five Times
I suggest a circular table for this one… needless to say I bruise like a peach. Shoes with strong grips are also a plus. Not suited for those easily nauseated.
Repeat a Snow Chant
This is one of my personal favorites because it leaves room for creativity and exploration. There are no clear guidelines as to what makes a good “snow chant,” but repeating chants to send a message to “the gods” is an age-old tradition. I always like to make mine rhyme,
Dance Variation: For those more physical form of artistic expression, try grabbing some friends, circling up, and offering up a dance as opposed to a chant as your message to the higher powers that be.
Sleep on the Opposite End of the Bed
Unclear if I made this one up or not, but it seems to go well with inside-out and backwards pajamas, so just go with it. It has to help confuse the snow gods even more, right? And if confused snow gods = snow day, then its backwards day all around for us!
Yell Snow Day Into The Freezer
This one seems to be somewhat logical at first… but not if you think about it for more than a second. That being said, it’s a quick and easy trick to throw in if we’re trying to get the odds in our favor. TBD if mini-fridge ice-boxes count as freezers.
BONUS: Sprinkle Shaved Ice Onto Trees Outside
This one’s new to me (Thanks, Google!) but seems fun so I’m willing to give it a try this weekend. Anyone have an icemaker? Can you shave ice with a razor? Will crushed ice not do? How about grabbing some of the existing snow (which will be piled high until Spring Weekend) and simply throwing that around? Any and all opinions are welcome as I put this new method to the test.