Dear Coffee Shop on the Corner,
It’s been an entire three hours since I’ve enjoyed your warmth, and I just can’t seem to get you off of my mind. Your soft lighting and chalkboard menu are so enticing that I often fantasize about entering through your doors and spending a studious afternoon within your walls. I can’t imagine any other place to stop during tired afternoons for a caffeine boost and cozy workspace. Your wonders are endless, and I can’t help but thank you for everything you do for me.
First, thank you for taking so long to perform any simple task. I enjoy standing in line, watching my laptop across the room and thinking for twenty minutes about the essay that’s due in an hour, while you chat with another barista about your friend’s new apartment. I find pleasure in quietly waiting for you as you play with your plethora of fair trade coffees, even though I ordered tea. I love the inevitable moral dilemma I face every time I feel obligated to tip you, despite the infuriating service I experience.
Second, thank you for essentially never having open tables. I love to stand awkwardly in the middle of the establishment, giving every person with an empty mug in front of them an empathetic glare. I know what it’s like to be them and totally don’t blame anybody for sitting for hours on end, but in the moment I always force my minor life struggles upon others so people understand my pain. It’s fun to be half on my phone and half on ‘threat level midnight’ high alert looking for an empty seat. It’s even better with friends because then you take up weird amounts of space where you’re not actually blocking anything, but people walking in can’t tell if you’re in line or waiting for a friend or just standing in the middle of everything for a group activity.
Third, thank you for placing all of your tables too close together. There’s nothing quite like having to listen to someone’s sexy Skype call or the feeling you get when some random person’s arm is mildly too close for comfort, but not close enough where you can say something. You have taught me how to squeeze through small spaces with a backpack, a hot beverage, and my headphones dangling from my phone. I can never thank you enough for actively teaching me this invaluable life skill, but I’m definitely still in the process of mastering it. An earbud may have ended up in someone’s coffee and a textbook may have lightly smashed into a head, but I’m sure it’s okay now.
Finally, I must say that I’m feeling compelled to actually defend you and all of your java glory. Maybe it’s because I need to justify spending $30 a week at your unimpressive establishment, or maybe it’s because I have some perverse love for you hidden deep inside that I can’t shake. Either way, thank you for making my chai latte to perfection every time. In a world where I don’t always get my 8.5 hours of sleep every night, and Donald Trump is a presidential nominee, you are a respite from reality. You don’t judge me for getting a cookie two days in a row. You froth my beverage to a pleasing amount of bubbles, which doesn’t happen anywhere else in my life. Most importantly, you are a two minute walk from my dorm room.
Sincerely,
A Tired College Student
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