Two months ago, while stuck in the full heat of August in my air condition-less house (my A/C broke in the middle of the summer), I packed a couple suitcases worth of clothes to bring with me to school. At the time I gravitated towards cute shorts, skirts, and tank tops that screamed “SUMMER BABY, WHOO!” Only towards the end of my packing endeavor did I halfheartedly throw in a single pair of jeans and one light jean jacket “just in case,” with no real intention (or supposition) that I would ever need to wear them. In my mind, I figured Providence would remain at a comfortable 75 degrees up until October, when I would be going home anyway and could swap out my warm weather outfits for fall and winter basics.
And for three weeks, I was great! 80 degree weather mixed with Providence humidity meant that the only acceptable option was a crop top and shorts.
But now that autumn has hit with its full blown force, I’m in a bit of a pickle. With no proper jacket and only one pair of long pants, I’ve been forced to come up with creative measures to stay warm while walking to class every morning:
Because I have no scarves, I’ve had to resort to using whatever is available. Luckily, the residents in my building love to use gloves when dishwashing…
All my cable neck sweaters are unfortunately still at home; but who needs that when you can simply weave real cables into…whatever this is!
The one jacket I brought with me doesn’t have a hood, so rather than wear it and let my head get cold, I was able to cut a head-shaped hole into an alligator-textured blanket I found in the dumpster outside the Ratty.
All of the dresses I have with me are sleeveless and leave my chest and shoulders exposed to the cold air. But with a lot little bit of tape and some golf balls, I was able to make something that not only kept those areas warm, but my head as well!
Rather than look stupid by putting a bowl on my head in lieu of a hat, I thought the next reasonable solution would be weaving a bunch of spools of thread with my real hair. They’re basically like hair extensions, but much more practical!
At this rate, I honestly probably won’t even need my parents to send me my fall clothes! I’m doing perfectly fine here!
(No, but seriously Mama, if you’re reading this – can you please send me a couple sweaters, jackets, and beanies? Those spools are giving me the worst strain in my neck, oh my god…)
