Google AdChoices isn’t about who you are, it’s about who you want to be. And I want to be a saucy woman that can seduce Paul Ryan. That’s why I have devoted the last twenty-four hours to searching for everything saucy, everything woman, and everything that Paul Ryan loves.
Author Archives for Allie Arnold
Don’t ask how; we just ~know~ PBI Chilliwack Bomber: Uninspired cowgirl after he’s had a long day out on the yacht. Chelsea Parka: Some spontaneous doggy style while the maid looks after the kids. Expedition Parka: Quasi-outdoor sex after a long night in front of your Brookstone electric fire pit.... Read More
The thing that freaks me out about kids is that they’re pretty transparent. You can tell if they are lying and you can tell if they just want attention and you can tell if they are going to grow up to be a huge ass. And then there are some... Read More
Unfortunately, we cannot offer you any additional funds for the 2016-2017 award year. The committee has determined that these seven things are a better investment than you. 1. Untitled (Lamp/Bear) This sculpture may have all the charm of a Coraline fever dream, the elegance of a carnival funhouse acid trip... Read More
Have you ever had those dreams where all of your teeth fall out? Where you’re flying? Being chased by something? Have you ever had those dreams where you’re pregnant, or as I like to call them, nightmares? Have you ever had dreams where all of the narration and dialogue has... Read More
The results are in! Turns out yellow is the statistical least favorite color. To clarify, it’s not America’s “least favorite” color (that’s usually brown or orange), it’s the favorite color that the least people have; the color that arouses the least enthusiasm. It’s the Jeb Bush of colors. This is backed up... Read More
Brown University has long offered a vast array of innovative and riveting courses that challenge and expand students’ modes of thought. This semester students can choose to gain a new perspective on the 90’s-00’s as an era of cowboy nostalgia. Bush, Blue Jeans, and Brokeback Mountain: Cowboy Culture at the Turn... Read More
The witching hour is nigh! Get ready for a night of spooks, booze, and all kinds of creeps by throwing together one of these cute, unique, and oh-so-clever costumes for you and your significant other.
It’s the million dollar or $39.99 box of rogaine question that’s on everyone’s mind. Will you go bald? The answer to that question lies in another question: Can you grow a beard? To clarify we’re not talking the purposeful kind of bald where you decide to throw in the towel... Read More
Lying, cheating, and presidential sex: it’s never just been for Bill “Slick Willy” Clinton and Richard “Tricky Dick” Nixon. The following is an analysis of Richard B. Morris‘s seven founding fathers–the dirty white boys of the old White House–and their sexual congress.