Author Archives for Sarah Clapp

If I Were The Bachelorette


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It is a truth universally acknowledged that every year one man and one woman must sacrifice themselves to satiate the network gods at ABC by becoming the “Bachelor” and the “Bachelorette” and embarking on a sacred quest to find the least objectionable suitor to date long distance for a few months... Read More


On Home Videos


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While I was at home during winter break, I binge-watched my home videos. The holiday season was making me feel especially nostalgic for a time when I actually, wholeheartedly, believed in Santa, so I pulled out the DVDs my family had our camcorder-captured memories put on to and watched them with... Read More


Socks, Guitar, Moon


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My roommate does CLPS studies for her Cognitive Science class. I like to imagine a cohort of scientists taping wires to her head in a laboratory overflowing with beakers so that they can develop highly advanced mind reading technology. In reality, it seems to be a lot of memory exercises... Read More


Elements of Style


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I would have never worn clogs in high school. I would have never worn turtlenecks or long dresses either because those were all things old women wore and I was young and vivacious. Which is to say, I wore skinny jeans, ballet flats and floral Forever 21 shirts, cultivating a... Read More


Your Thanksgiving Horoscope


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Aquarius: There are going to be an unprecedented number of obscure relatives at dinner this year, and they’re all going to ask “how you are” and “what you’re studying” and other questions that you have no interest in answering. If you just keep replying with “please pass the squash,” they’ll... Read More


An Agricultural Awakening


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For a college student, I think a lot about buying 100 acres of farm land in Western Massachusetts and some chickens. Recently (like, this year), I’ve had the epiphany that I should be a farmer because whenever I think about what I should do with my life (become a writer? an educator? a... Read More


5 Jobs That Don’t Exist Yet (And How To Get Them)


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Twenty years ago, no one would have been able to anticipate that social media editor, professional vlogger or Donald Trump’s Presidential Campaign Manager would be viable jobs in 2016. Don’t fret if you haven’t found a vocational path you’re passionate about—it might not exist yet! Start preparing your resumes by... Read More


Girl Seeking Ghost


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Calling all ghosts and ghouls! I am a college sophomore just looking to be haunted, and you could be the lucky phantom friend I’ve been waiting for. I’m posting this classified because if I wait any longer for a ghost to manifest itself in my presence, this spooky season will be... Read More